Do you know what freshen up means?
What does it mean when a woman says, “Excuse me, I’m going to go freshen up”? Does she just say that because it’s not lady-like to say she has to pee, or does she actually do something special? In the movies when a woman says, “Excuse me, I’m going to go freshen up,” she shuts the door and you don’t get to see what she freshens.
Another question: why do we call the toilet and sink place in public places, the bathroom? Those rooms don’t have bathtubs or showers. Also why do we call that room a restroom when there aren’t beds or hammocks in them? One more, Powder Room? By definition, it sounds like a room stocked with all sorts of powders; baby powder, face powder, baking powder, anti-itch powder, gun powder you choose.
Probably most women say they’re going to “freshen up,” because it’s so much nicer to say than urinate or defecate (oh those words sound so nasty). If you Google, “What do women do to freshen up?” you’ll get socked with a million ads for beauty products, so don’t bother. Since we really don’t know what’s done in the name of freshening up, here are some suggestions.
1. Get a drink of water
2. Use the toilet
3. Wash your hands
4. Think of something to be thankful for
5. Put on Chap Stick or lipstick
6. Put on perfume
7. Apply hand lotion
8. Comb hair
10. Take a bird bath (use wet nap for smelly body parts)
11. Put on new deodorant over the old
12. Brush teeth
Mom freshened up daily. Every evening, just before dad would come home from work, mom would say, “Oh, dad’ll be home in a little while, I’d better freshen up.” I never went into the bathroom (it had a bathtub) with her to see what she did, but I’d hear the toilet flush, the faucet to the sink run and she’d come out with her hair re-combed, lipstick on and she smelled of her perfume. She took about five minutes.
My sister and I were in LA to be on AM Los Angeles and we were invited to stay overnight with a producer. When we got to her home in the Hollywood Hills, she showed us to her guestroom we’d be sharing and she said, “Would you like to freshen up?” My sister and I answered in unison, “Yes,” but as soon as the woman left, we looked at each other and I said, “What should we do?” We ruled out bathing and changing clothes, and remembered that Mom took five minutes. So we decided to wash our hands for five minutes.
We each had our own sink and as we put our hands in the warm water, we both had to pee. Taking turns cut into our five minutes, but we had a bigger problem. At each sink were small soaps shaped like sea shells, turtles and mermaids (the guestroom had an under-sea garden theme) and they were so beautiful we didn’t want to wreck them. We found a bar of regular soap in the shower so we shared that instead of wetting the pretty soaps.
At the end of five minutes of washing, when it was time to dry our hands, we were stopped by the guest hand towels. They were beautifully pressed and looked more like art than utility and we weren’t sure if they were for wiping. As we stood looking at each other in the mirror, we looked like two surgeons with hands out ready for someone to dry them. We couldn’t wipe on our dresses so we wiped on the rug and joined the producer in her living room, freshened up.
Now that you know what to do, perhaps right now would be a good time to freshen up!
For more from Pam Young, go to www.cluborganized.com.